Broken Bad Boy

19

PERCIE

Eight months ago…

I hugged Emma, still unconscious in bed. “Please, I need you. I still need you. Don’t you leave me

alone again? Our parents disowned me, Em. I have no one left. I lost you once, and I can’t lose you

again. Please, hang in there for me. You’ll have my kidney, sweetheart. Please, Emma, do this for me

once again. I love you, and I can’t live without you. Please? Why didn’t you tell me? What’s with the

secrecy? How about our promises of no more secrets, huh?” I cried and begged for her, hoping that

maybe, she could still hear me, hoping for a miracle.

“Percie, let the doctor see Emma.” Grandma touched my shoulder. I didn’t move. I couldn’t let go of

Emma. I ignored them and sobbed.

“Son, we have to let them treat Emma. Please, let them do whatever is necessary to help her. Time is

running out, Percival.” Grandpa grabbed my arm.

“No.” I shook my head. “You all lied to me.”

“Percival, we need to talk to you.” I stopped and raised my head from Emma’s body as soon as I heard

the doctor.

“Follow me to my office, please?”

I sat down in the bed, looked at her one more time before I stood up. I wiped my face and walked away

from Emma.

I walked back to her and kissed her forehead. “I love you Em. I’ll do everything for you. Don’t give up

just yet.”

“Percival, we have to call your parents and inform them about Emma. I’m not gonna lie to you. Once

they arrive, you might not be able to see Emma again,” Grandpa said regrettably as he raked his

fingers through his graying hair.

“They’re not going to kick me out once they find out I’m gonna donate my kidney to Emma,” I said

dismissively.

“Emma has reasons why she didn’t tell you—”

I cut him off. “And what is that? Tell me, Grandpa. Did she make you promise not to tell me about this?

Tell me, what are those reasons. She fucking deserved my kidney if you just only being honest with me

from the start. I could still help her before this happens. I’m the only reason why Emma is unconscious

in a hospital bed right now. This is all because of me.”

“Percie, she made her decision.”

“Fuck that decision. Have you forgotten what I did to her? The reason why she has been suffering for

months, it’s because of me. Don’t you understand that? This is the only way I can repay her. She

deserves to live than me. She has a lot of reasons to live. She has so much life ahead of her. Me?

Nothing! She is the only reason why I still want to live. If I lost her again, I’d rather die!”

Shock flashed across their faces. They hadn’t said a word after that.

I went into the doctor’s room where Dr. Mills was waiting for me or us.

I slumped my ass into the chair. “Do what’s necessary.”

“Let me be straight with you, Percival. She’s in a deep coma right now. Even if they start her HD right novelbin

away, I can’t tell you when she’s gonna wake up. Her blood urea and creatinine are at their peaks. Her

blood pressure shoots up, and still, she has no urine output.”

The universe just came crashing down on me. I understood what she’d just told me after reading tons

of medical books when Emma had SCI. I could hardly breathe. I knew what that meant.

Grandpa fished out something in his back pocket and handed a folded white paper to me.

“Percival, Emma told me to give this to you if—” He swallowed. “If she won’t make it.” He took a deep

breath. “Take this, Percie.”

“She will make it. I make sure of that.” I took it with a trembling hand.

I opened the paper slowly. It was Emma’s penmanship.

A letter.

I heard Dr. Mills’ name being paged overhead. I folded the paper and slipped it into Emma’s bag. Dr.

Mills left the room immediately.

I grabbed Emma’s backpack and left my grandparents alone in the doctor’s room. I strode my way out

of the hospital without looking back.

When my phone vibrated from my jeans pocket, I knew it wasn’t good news. I prepared myself for

whatever it would be. I didn’t bother checking the caller ID. My phone almost fell from my trembling

hand after hearing Grandpa’s last words.

I loved Emma more than she’d ever known. If it wasn’t for her, I would have definitely lost myself to

grief. I made a promise to her, and as much as how hard it was, I had to keep that.

I took a cab back to our hotel where I spent the last night eating her favorite ice cream that I hated.

Because I lost in her game, I had to swallow each spoonful of her ice cream. Her image laughing at me

rushed back at me like a strong whirl of wind.

I forced myself to feel numb. I didn’t want to feel anything—I couldn’t feel the pain. If I felt the pain, I

would fall apart. I couldn’t do this to her. I had to be strong, and to be strong was to be numb.

We went back to see Emma the very next morning to claim her from the hospital morgue.

We arrived at the airport, the very same airport where we traveled happily to New York with only one

goal— to let Emma race in the Paralympics. This time, we came back with two reasons, grief and loss.

“You, worthless!” It was my mother, yelling after she just slapped me across my face. But I didn’t feel

anything. It was just like air blew on my face.

Everyone around who witnessed gasped. Who gave a fuck? I didn’t even bother looking at her. I moved

forward and pushed our luggage.

“You killed Emma! You killed her! I will never forgive you! I loathed you. You’re not my son anymore,

Percival!” Mom shouted and followed me. I ignored her behind me as I continued leaving until I reached

the parking area.

Dad grabbed me by my shirt, pushed me against his car. His eyes filled with rage, anger, and pain.

“How could you let her race, Percie? You let her die there. You sent her to her death. You, worthless

piece of shit.”

I didn’t react. I thought of my father as if invisible.

Grandma came between my parents and me, glaring at them. “Enough both of you! You don’t know

anything about what happened there. You don’t know anything about what Emma has wanted in her

life. All you wanted was about your business and your money. You never cared what she wanted. You

both never asked her what she needed. And you would never know how Percie helped Emma. Do I

have to remind you how you throw your daughter away because she has a defect?”

They gasped in shock.

I ignored the looks on their faces. They deserved that. I got inside the car after loading our luggage into

the back of our car.

My parents took care of Emma. They arranged her funeral. Whether they like it or not, I would see

Emma one last time. Or I would create a scene that everyone would never forget. I was done trying to

be a nice son, which I was not in the first place.

This time, it was my choice.